Actual signs and bumper stickers spotted around the country.
** On a Plumbers truck : "We repair what your husband fixed."
** Pizza shop slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one weak."
** At a towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."
** In a non-smoking area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
** On a maternity room door: "Push. Push. Push."
** At an optometrist's office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
** On a fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive."
** In a veterinarian's waiting room : "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
** In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait."